Relationship Advice For Women: 3 Qualities You Need From Your Man's Mother To Make Him Love You

This relationship advice for women is something that might make some people squeamish. The idea that men tend to be attracted to women who resemble their mother and vice versa for women is somewhat unsettling. Yet, there is a ring of truth to it, especially if the man that you've married is somewhat of a mother's boy. You don't have to do all cooking and cleaning after him (he can do that himself), but there are a few traits that you shouldn't over look if you're looking to have your man respect and love you as much as he does his mother.

1. Tell Him Off

A mother always knows how to tell off his son. Ask any mother and they usually say that they want their son to grow up to be a good man, someone respectable and dignified. That's why it's important for her to tell him off when he's growing up so that he grows up grounded.

Don't be afraid to tell your man off. It's worth the fight or two if it establishes that you do have authority in the relationship. It should be even. If your man gets his way all the time, you're never going to be happy and he's never going to love you as much as he can.

2. The Constant

The mother is always there. As the wife, you should also always be there for your man. However, this doesn't mean that you always have to comfort him. Sometimes, the best thing for a man is a little bit of tough love.

Caring doesn't mean that you always have to encourage him positively either. By being negative once in a while, this will communicate to him that he has to really earn your respect and put in that consistent effort to get your love.

3. Let Him Go

A mother has to know how to let her son go. Only then can he grow up and be a man. As a wife, you also have to let your man go. If you're too persistent and too clingy, this is going to make your man resent you to an extent.

His mother is a strong person and if you want to be as strong as her, you must have to guts to tell him to go away sometimes and leave you alone. This will make him admire your strength to push him away, which will make him loyal to you.

This relationship advice for women might seem sort of weird, but there is a lot you can learn from your husband's mother. Don't worry you don't have to ask her anything. This article has told you everything you need to know.

Jack Keys is a married to his wife, Elle and has a beautiful baby daughter with her. His psychology degree, combined with his real-life experience in his own marriage has turned him into an accidental relationship adviser amongst his friends and colleagues.

He specializes in relationship advice for women and shares his knowledge with women who want to strengthen their relationship with their husband.

His latest 10-page report talks about how to get more love and respect from your husband, written especially for women who are finding that their man is falling out of love with them.

Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/?expert=J._Keys

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6 Tips - How to Get My Ex Boyfriend Back When He Has Moved On

Losing the one you love doesn't exactly mean you lost. You lose when you give up. To win your ex-boyfriend back when he's moved on could be a challenge but everything is possible when you try. I've been in your same situation and it wasn't until I challenged myself, that I then I realized I won what I once thought I lost. It's like the saying you don't know unless you try, right?

1- The first step to getting the one you love back is somehow making him still believe he still wants you. If this doesn't work there are definitely much more tactics you can try from here.

2- One of the most beneficial things you can try is to start a friendship with him. Become really good friends. Show him what a good friend you can be by showing him you understand how he feels, show him a fun side of you, crack funny jokes, make him laugh, and even invite him for coffee sometime. He may start to wonder at this point that he may want you again.

3- When you speak to your ex-boyfriend make sure you're extra sweet and kind. Don't play games, trying to act hard to get. You want to him to want you still. Don't make yourself totally available either, do give him space. You do want him to want you as well, so let him have a chance to think about you.

4- At this point you've shown him what a good time he can have with you, even if it's a friendship for now. You want him to know you're still available but slightly keep your distance. Hang out with you friends and have a good time. This will make him wonder about you, and he may slightly start to feel jealousy. This good sign because he will start to really ask him why he is feeling this way.

5- When he does ask you about your weekends and what you have been up to, be sincere and honest. Tell him you miss him, but don't make it sound like you're desperate. You want him to know you still care but also that you're still having fun too. He will see you're confident and realize he doesn't have you.

6- Remind him of the good times you had together. Don't talk about anything negative or start any drama. Bring up a favorite spot you both had and enjoyed being there together. Also, bring up the first time you met and how you feel in love. This will trigger emotions, good emotions of course.

These are just ideas that helped me get back with my ex-boyfriend once I thought I had lost him. Now we're back together and I could say we have the best relationship and he's truly my best-friend!

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The Real Reason You're Not Attractive To Women

Does it always seem that your friends attract more women than you do? Do you feel comfortable in the presence of the opposite sex or do you always say the wrong thing and put them off? How is it that some men just seem to attract women naturally without actually doing anything? Are all the other men better looking than you? Taller? Wealthier? Funnier?... Probably not. So what elusive quality do they have that you don't?

Confidence.... Attracting the opposite sex is all about having the self confidence to talk with them, joke with them and make them feel good.

The man who can do this will not necessarily be the best looking guy in the room he just has that something special, the x factor if you like. He is charismatic and he is that way because he is 100% confident in himself. He may not even be aware of it, but attracting women is down to more than a nice face - it is a mindset and belief!

This man naturally believes that he is attractive to women and that they will find him interesting and want to spend time with him. There is no doubt in his mind about this. He enjoys the challenges of approaching new women and getting to know them. He doesn't dwell on the possibility of rejection, because it rarely happens to him. But if it does, he shrugs his shoulders and moves on to the next lady. He doesn't spend time wondering why it happened or doubting his appeal, he sees it as their loss and carries on with his life.

So, now you know why some men have all the luck with women - and others don't. but that's not of much to you I don't suppose. What you really want to know is - how can I make myself attractive to women - right?

But do you know what You CAN change the Way you think, so that you will attract women naturally.

Before I proceed, just so that you know, I used these very same methods myself and if you want to see how well they work, I have included a link for you at the end of this article. I am the upper side of 50 and suffered from a crippling lack of confidence, that affected every area of my life, especially when trying to approach members of the opposite sex. So I know what I'm talking about, because I've been where you are.

I realised that I needed to work on myself and that there was help available, but I didn't have the time, money or confidence to attend classes. I'm not a great reader and so I decided against self help books. However, I did stumble upon subliminal messages, which completely turned my life around.

I'm not claiming that they offer a quick fix or that you will change into a super confident honey magnet overnight, but they changed my attitude and my life completely.

Subliminal messages send information directly into your subconscious mind, just like hypnosis so that you can change your thought patterns at a deeper level. The positive statements will gradually target and destroy the negative self beliefs that you have concerning your ability to date beautiful women.

Put the time in and you will see the results.

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How Do You Know Your Guy Is Really Into You - 3 Tips That Tell If a Guy Likes You

Okay lady's, let's set the stage to establish some momentum of the relationship. So, you've just left your office for lunch then out of the corner of your eye you notice a fine specimen of a man. Suddenly the temperature surges to 90 degrees, everything seems to be played in slow motion and in your head you hear the seductive notes of "between the sheets" being played. You take a glance in the nearby window just to double check you're all that. You steady your nerves gain your composure muster up a confident stride and prepare for sparks to fly.

Both your eyes meet and lock into a stare when suddenly you notice an attractive female walking hastily towards him. Your eyes drop and you think oh, why am I so unlucky. You're so consumed in reprimanding yourself you didn't notice him look back and smile.

Annoyed with yourself you decide some retail therapy is in order. The song still playing in your head you V line for the Negligee store. There, you see a black silk one that is to die for and you think yes, I'll have this. But then you remember when am going to wear it anyway. Instead you decide to pass on the impulse purchase and indulge in some comfort food.

Moving three weeks forward... you're out jogging one evening, given up on ever seeing him ever again, when you became distracted by a disturbance behind you. Only to turn around and bump straight into "Mr between the sheets" himself. He came for a walk to clear his head regarding decisions he needed to make. Embarrassed, you apologize and before long you are both conversing as if you were old time friends. You both exchanged numbers and keep in touch.

Its been 6 months now since you have been getting to know each other and you think finally I have met a really nice guy. But now you are not sure if he likes you as much as you like him. As by now you are definitely feeling a bond developing but you are unsure if he feels the same way. It's hard to tell as some times it appears that way, but at other times it doesn't. You maybe feeling a bit confused as you are picking up mixed messages. You want to know for sure he feels the same way before letting your feelings show.

But before we look at whether or not he likes you let's considered whether or not you really want him to like you. Have you decided what it is you want from the relationship? Explored compatibility and whether or not it is worth a long term emotional investment? Or are you just going along for the ride and just hoping it all works out?

If you're having a good feeling about this guy after looking at it from practical perspective and he ticks most of your boxes let's look closer. Generally speaking men guard the door to their innermost soul very well they sometimes slip up and then they recompose. This causes a lot of confusion and contributes to the mixed message signals you maybe receiving.

Here are 3 Tips that Tell if a Guy Likes You?

Tip1
He asks a lot of questions if he sees you being friendly towards another guy. This could indicate that he is marking and protecting his territory. This could mean he is very interested and making sure there are no unpleasant surprises.

Tip2
He calls often and isn't comparing how often you have or have not called. This shows he is thinking about you and is confident within himself. This could be a sign that he is getting to know your schedule, likes and dislikes, pet peeves etc.

Tip3
He worries if he has not heard from you. This is a sign he is definitely bonding, it shows he cares for and about you. He now knows your schedule and your normal behavior and is able to spot something outside the ordinary and shows concern for your welfare.

These are a few tell tale signs that will help you know if a guy really likes you.

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Is It TRUE Love? 3 UNUSUAL Love Compatibility Tests That EVERY Woman Should Try Once

Is it really true love? Is he REALLY Mr. Right... or simply, as happens FAR too often... Mr. Right NOW? And is there any real way of finding out how much he loves you without having to beg, ask his friends of embarrass yourself silly? In this article we are going to take a quick and insightful look at 3 unusual love compatibility tests that are VERY unusual, a bit weird, but AMAZINGLY effective as well! Curious to know more? Continue reading as we take a closer look below!

Now, before I give you the 3 very specific tests you can do, I want to WARN you ahead of time.

These are NOT for old fashioned, closed minded thinkers, die hard cynics and skeptics, and women who don't have a sense of AMOROUS adventure. If you are an old fashioned woman afraid to open your mind, heart and spirit to the MAGIC of the Universe around you, you may want to skip these 3 techniques completely. But if you are open to the idea that each of our lives is about PASSION, and purpose and little "dash of DESTINY", I'm writing this article with YOU in mind... :-)

1 - The ENERGY of Amore

Or said differently, have your aura compared to your partners! Believe it or not, energy science is making RADICAL improvements and advancements each and every year, and the idea of auras, or that we EACH have a unique energetic fingerprint, is growing more and more mainstream. Did you know that emotional empaths and intuitives have been USING energy, and aura's to match couples and lovers for literally HUNDREDS of years. It's true... and there are many gifted relationship therapists that use the energy of emotion, or the AURA of love, to predict how long a relationship will last... with uncanny accuracy!

2 - Is Your Soulmate in the STARS?

The most popular reason to consult an astrological chart or to seek out a professional horoscope in 2010 was for matters of the heart! More people are turning to the cosmos for answers on LOVE, lust, romance and relationship than at any time in human history. And if you really want to TEST the authenticity of your current relationship, there is no better way than to get a full astrological reading for love. (although you may NOT always like what you hear! I had an 11 year relationship come to an end after a well known local love astrologer clearly told us we were BOTH in love with other people... and believe it or not, it was true!)

3 - Pass the Psychic Love Test! (the SECRET to Celebrity Romances that DO Last!)

Simply stated... a good love psychic reading is the very BEST way to test your KARMIC connection than any other method I know... short of reading his mind yourself..:-) The truth is, a good emotional intuitive can do things that a normal relationship counselor, therapist, friend or even family member can - they can offer you OBJECTIVE, but empathetic advice and insight on what they see for you, without being clouded by their feelings for you, or your partner. Are all love intuitives good? Absolutely NOT. Most are fairly worthless. But if you speak to a good one who has a legitimate gifts and intuitive insight like I have, what they are able to see WILL blow you away. (and there is NO better "WEIRD" way to test your love, or commitment and future together, than this... and have a whole lot of entertaining fun in the process!)

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Romance or Friendship? 3 EASY Ways to Find True Love (Even If You're JUST Friends Right Now)

Is it ROMANTIC or are you just simply friends? How can you tell what he's REALLY thinking, without having to beg, sound desperate or bother his friends? Are you sick and tired of trying to read his body language, or guess what his little code phrases mean, or even simply trying to intuit his intentions WITHOUT having to come right and ask what's up? And can you truly find love through friendship, or do you need to PUSH, bother or beg him for answers straight out of the gate to know where "this" is going... right away?

In this article we are going to take a quick and easy look at a few simple ways to help a friendship BLOSSOM into a full fledged romance, and figure out what he REALLY wants, all at the very same time. Curious to know more? Continue reading as we take a closer look below!

Allow yourself to be VULNERABLE (it really DOESN'T hurt, I promise!)

Take some chances, and open up a bit. You don't have to embarrass yourself, look desperate or even be overly aggressive to let someone know you are interested in taking things in a more interesting direction. The truth is, he'll most likely be flattered... and appreciative that you find him attractive in a romantic way. But don't do this in a haphazard way... or you'll find yourself TOO vulnerable, making "in the moment" choices you may BOTH regret later!

Relax Your Expectations

Don't push for answers. If you get back a response, either verbally or physically that you DON'T expect or anticipate, don't jump to conclusions or assumptions about what that may (or may not) mean. The truth is, some of MY best and most memorable relationships started slowly... and from friendships that seemed "locked in plutonic" before they ever bloomed into real romance. Remember, if he's worth getting to know in an intimate way... the BEST path to passion is through an evolving friendship as well.

Do NOT play games (or buy into the BULL)

Be honest, open and genuine about how you feel. There is no "time limit" to tell someone something that comes from the heart. There is no rule-book... or blueprint for taking a friendship to the next level. The truth is, if you stay honest, open, and don't obsess about the relationship, you'll find that doors open that you may NOT have realized were there... and amazing things can happen, once they do!

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Forcing Someone to Love You

Love is a very powerful thing. you will do things that you have never thought that you could do. Love can either make you happy or make you sad or worse it will make you insane, the kind of love that consumes you. Have you ever experienced loving someone and that someone doesn't love you back? It is painful and so depressing. I know that every person has experienced it, and I know how you feel.

Forcing someone to have the same feelings for you is really tough because love is not something where you can jut pick it up, put it in your heart and then instantly that person loves you back. Love happens when you least expect it. Sometimes, you don't even know that you already love someone. You can never force someone or anyone to love you back. I know how painful it is, I too have experienced loving someone and expecting that person that he feels the same thing as what I feel for him. I was really devastated and I really wanted to know why but it was not worth it, he already loves someone and I don't want to become a person that will destroy the love that they have.

It is not worth your time and effort to indulge yourself to someone who won't be able to return the love that you feel for them. The more you force someone to love you the more that person will not love you, haven't you noticed? When you were a child, when your mother will force you to eat your food, you will not eat your food. If at present you are doing everything so that a certain person will love you back please stop it, you will just get hurt and it will hurt you more if you keep on forcing yourself to someone.

Here's an advice, try focusing your attention to different things or activities that will occupy your time, for example indulge in a new sport, spend time with your family and friends or better yet meet new people at work maybe? At school? Do not limit yourself open up to the world and you will see, a lot more beautiful things out there. There might be other people out there ready to love you completely where you don't need to force them, who accepts you for who you are and loves you totally. Just open your eyes and maybe you'll see you might be focusing yourself on one person and not notice those people who loves you.

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Stop Looking for Your Type

You think you know your type. In fact, you are sure of it. You have actually dated them, perhaps even married them - more than once on both counts. So, let me ask you, if you know your type so well, why are you still looking for Mr. Right?

Get over your type and open your mind, your feelings, and your experiences to seeing who may be right for you. If knowing your type were working so well, you would not be looking. With that harsh realty acknowledged and accepted, are you ready to move on?

Of course, there is the other side of the coin. He's NOT my type. As well as you think you know your type, you also think you know who is not your type. This is as a big a problem in my opinion as knowing who your type is.'

Let me share this with you. If I had continued to judge potential dates by types, I would not now be married to the most amazing man and someone who is so perfect for me. I had started to date all kinds of men and learned how interesting, funny, intelligent, caring men can be. I also learned what it felt like to be with men - it was different, than what I thought my type was.

I am so glad that I got out of my own way, finally, and just trusted in the process of knowing the qualities, characteristics, attributes, personality, and way of being together that was right for me. This took time, reflection and making sense of my past relationships. It was worth it.

I am so happy that I stopped looking for my type, and began to open myself to possibilities. Now I am happily married to someone who I could have easily dismissed as 'not my type.'

Chemistry grows over time and is based on many factors. Yet, so many women dismiss potential men because they don't "feel" it right away. If you are basing a lifetime of happiness on whether or not your heart jolts at first sight, you are selling yourself short and missing out on many opportunities.

Give a man and yourself a chance to interact, talk, and know him before you decide there is no chemistry. The other thing to keep in mind is that we often gravitate to what we know and feels comfortable to us on a subconscious level. Yet, if that were working so well, you would not be single and looking.

It takes courage to try something new and break out of your comfort zone. People, who do, often tell me how happy they are. There is a whole world waiting for you that you don't even know exists and that includes amazing relationships with men. How will you know unless you give it a try?

Sounds easy. Yet if it were, we'd all be with our perfect partners. Divorce would be non-existent. Online dating sites and agencies would not exist and there would be far less singles. As Lord Chesterfield eloquently has said, "You must look into other people as well as at them." Look into their good, their gifts, and see them. Give yourself and the people you meet this gift and watch the quality of your relationships improve.

Then watch the quality of the men you meet improve. Love is not easy, yet it is glorious when you find it. Open yourself to the possibility of love in people and places you might not expect. Mr. Right is waiting for you.

By the way, for you men this applies equally to you! Your perfect lady is waiting for you to recognize her.

Cheri Valentine is your love connection expert. She specializes in guiding busy professional leaders and business owners to find long lasting love to enjoy as much happiness and success in their personal lives as they do in their career. Cheri's philosophy inspired love by design combined with her strong, supportive nature is reflected in her signature coaching programs. She believes everyone deserves to love and be loved unconditionally, to experience life passionately and to forge happy and healthy relationships. Cheri's own efforts to make sense of her ended marriages and relationships fueled her determination to get it right, be happy and find the right partner. She has succeeded and recently married her perfect mate. She wants to show you how she did it, and how you can, too, just like the many men and women she has helped to find love. Visit http://cherivalentine.com/ for your FREE 4 step kit to Attract Your Perfect Mate.

Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/?expert=Cheri_C_Valentine

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How to Make a Relationship Work - 5 Quick Tips

Learning how to make a relationship work usually starts with both partners learning to build trust in their relationship. I often get asked for relationship advice from people trying to prevent a relationship break up and the lack of trust in a relationship is usually the biggest cause of problems. With that in mind here are my top five tips:

1 Building trust in a relationship

Learning to trust your partner is my number one tip whenever anyone asks me advice on how to make a relationship work. Lack of trust in a relationship is usually the main cause of relationship break ups. Although you may feel madly in love, it is not advisable or healthy for you to live in your partner's pockets.

There are going to be times when your partner will wish to spend time with their friends or family and it is vital that both partners can do this without the fear of repercussions or accusations. If you have already done something to break your partners trust, it is vital that you talk to them about this. You talk about how you fear losing them after you have broken their trust. Trust can be gained or regained with time and it is the vital ingredient in making a relationship work.

2 Communicate about everything

Communication is another key element in how to make a relationship work. If you want to save your relationship you must be able to talk to your partner openly and honestly about everything. Even though you might think your daily life is boring this does include your day to day activities. You don't have to tell your partner about all the mundane events at the office; try selecting a couple of key moments from your day to talk about.

You must also be able to communicate your problems with your partner as soon as they happen. Bottling problems up rarely resolves them and usually leads to further problems in the long run. Your partner is with you for a reason so make sure you communicate with them. In addition you should be open and understanding when your partner wants to discuss their problems with you.

3 Pay Attention to Your Partner

I heard the following saying a long time ago; "You have one mouth and two ears - use them in that proportion".

One of the best ways to avoid a relationship break up is to pay attention to your partner. Make sure you listen when they tell you things and learn to understand what they like and what they don't like. No matter what commitments or activities your partake in, you most definitely should aim to spend quality time together at least once a week. This can range from a quiet night curled up with a DVD to partaking in an event you both enjoy. Whatever it is; make sure you make the time to do it.

4. Fight For Your Love - Not With Them

In any relationship there are going to be situations where two people do not agree on everything. Fighting in a relationship happens but instead of acting with pig headed stubbornness try to use the opportunity to better understand your partner and why they think like they do. Your partner is an individual.

If you have a fight resolve it and move on.

5 Learn the Benefits of Positive Thinking

I am not going to start preaching about the benefits of positive thinking but it is certainly something you should give some consideration too. And surely it can't hurt to give it a try! Think about the people you work with or socialise with on a daily or weekly basis. Do you enjoy spending time with the negative or positive people?

Instead of saying things like "I haven't got time to do that with you" you could try and say "I will make the time to do it with you"

Used with the other points above, positive thinking can greatly reduce the possibility of a relationship break up.

The key point to remember if you are trying to save a relationship is to learn to build trust. Within this post you have learned the key points of how to make a relationship work.

About The Author
Stuart Sellars is the founder and creator of Saving a Relationship

Most people only consider saving a relationship after it has broken down. What most people don't realise is the things you do at this time are usually the wrong things which results in you pushing your ex partner further away. What you do during this period is critical if your really do want to get your ex back.

Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/?expert=Stuart_Sellars

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Six Basic Fears That Change Relationships

So, in your dealings with others be aware that if you push a person into one of these six fears they will not act rationally.

It is also a degree of self-awareness to note that if you start acting with stress or nervous tension, or lose your sense of self-humour (can't laugh at yourself) or find yourself worried, sleepless or run down and needing a holiday, then the source of that exhaustion and unhappiness is one of these six fears:

The Fear of PovertyThe Fear of Old AgeThe Fear of CriticismThe Fear of Loss of Love from SomeoneThe Fear of Ill HealthThe Fear of Death

While any one of these six fears run our day, we cannot be authentic because happiness will be defined as the overcoming of a fear, even if that fear is subconscious.

It is argued that these fears are socialised into our memes and therefore are not always in our field of awareness. In other words we may often be acting from fear even when we'd argue that we are not.

Animals act from instinct. Most instinct is underpinned by fear. Animals act from fear nearly 100% of the time, even when they are being affectionate, fear is driving this.

Human fear is animal instinct and it is inherent within our everyday being when we are operating at our animal level of life. That level still exists in all humans as a protective mechanism.

When, for example, you hear a person say "I GOT TO" or "I HAVE TO" or "YOU'VE GOT TO" or "YOU HAVE TO" then you can recognise the animal level of human being, and the presence of a driving fear. (one of the six or all)

1. The Fear of Poverty

People fill their pockets with money because they don't trust. Our world has become simplistically identified with wealth as a barometer of a person's value.

Wealthy seems to imply successful and yet, wealth on the outside and inner-wealth seem to be recognised as separate conversations.

A person with wealth who has no inner wealth will fear the loss of wealth. A person in poverty who has inner wealth will have no fear of poverty because they will have trust.

If there is an inherent lack of trust in humans and God, a person will grasp for wealth in order to escape the fear of poverty but they will never rest. The fear cannot be expunged for more than a few weeks with increased wealth before the fear resurfaces and there is once again, not enough.

Trust in people, life and God can be easily eroded with the death of a parent, pain inflicted by a trusted family member or breach of faith from a trusted friend. All this, most significantly happens within the first three years of a person's life, but escalates to classical scenarios of abuse and deception later in life. If trust is sustained within the first three years of a person's life, it is unlikely to fade later in life, no matter what transpires.

Fear of poverty comes from lack of trust and this can also be passed genetically from mother, father to child in the first three years. Awareness of such emotional, energetic, DNA and electrical transfer is the topic of most good parenting guidance.

2. The Fear of Old Age

There are two roots to the fear of Old Age. One emanates from the fear of poverty and the other from the fear of helplessness, unable to protect oneself from the from the fears mentioned in Fear 3 and Fear 4.

3. The Fear of Criticism

The whole fashion industry evolved out of this fear. And now, social networking, where media can, if well filtered protect a person from this deepest of fears.

We can choose electronic friends, disguise ourselves in fashion, we can drive a car to make a statement but all the time, living in fear that someone will reject us.

This fear of criticism is highly emotional and causes huge choices in people's subconscious life. It means, we go and associate with others who we believe will not criticise us.

It is also the cause of relationship failure in more than 90% of cases. The fear of criticism sits beneath many marriage arrangements that are called love where an individual holds shame or guilt about themselves, their life, their actions or their family, they hope to find a place to hide and relax with that fear, and often choose relationships. But soon, in that relationship, their fears come near, and they begin to feel ashamed of themselves blaming their partner for the breakdown, not realising that they entered the relationship carrying a fear and will leave with the same fear.

4. The Fear of Loss of Love from Someone

For many men, relationships with women are their anti depressant. It can be seen from the number of men who become insane after relationships end that the relationship was causing more than love.

Jealousy, hate, murder, rape, violence, abuse, greed and so many more of the base emotional animal in humans come from the fear of loss of love from someone.

Many people define the sustaining of love as a singular loyalty. In childhood this can be seen when children get hurt when a "best friend" adopts another friend, and the first child feels competed against. Fear, love, and the loss of it from someone, seems to be triggered by so many strange social signals.

Sex with strangers is great example. Sex and love are separate topics but we bind them religiously in order to protect love. We fear, deeply that sex will lead to love, so, we bind people into monogamy.

Fear of loss of love from someone is not limited to relationships of an adult significant other. Parents, friends, work colleagues, and more are not mentioned as "valuable Love" sources but are. Hence, many of the upsets that come in such environments are driven, in the greatest part, by the fear of loss of love from someone.

5. The Fear of Ill Health

Fear of Ill health has its roots in similar places to the Fear of Old Age and the Fear of Poverty.

It seems obvious that health is natural, however, in our search to avoid it, we become vulnerable to so much of the marketing and sales hype of shonky teachers, products and process that we make ourselves ill.

Foods, fast foods are decorated to appear healthy. Herbs and medicines follow traditional healthy packaging displays and Television advertising, even for dish washing liquid, portrays this product under the banner of a healthy giving, fear alleviating product benefit.

The fear of ill health drives many people to illness.

6. The Fear of Death

Nobody knows what happens before we're born or after we die. Many guess, some sell ideas, others find passages in books to deal with their fear of death, but there is uncertainty about death and therefore an enormous fear of it.

The more animal nature a person experiences the deeper their fear. One such exhibition of human animal nature is in terrorism and fundamental religious teachings that exclude all argument in the name of RIGHTEOUSNESS. A resolution of fear in this case is a belief. Such beliefs are based on uncertainty, upheld in righteousness by adherence.

It is the source of the greatest human deception, religious beliefs that promise certainty of the afterlife and therefore one can argue that the FEAR of DEATH must be a great fear in all human kind.

If one person says, "I know what will happen to me after my death" you can know with certainty only one thing, and that is, this person has a huge innate fear of death to which they apply, a belief to overcome it. Be aware that if you scratch the surface of such a person's belief you will scratch their fear and, as in all animal nature, their behavior will be unpredictable, aggressive and protective.

Beyond Fear

Beyond fear as a driving force in life there is another world. This is not an escape from fear, because, fear and the six fears are there by necessity. What can change however, with relatively simple application, is the influence those fears have on our relationships, health, wealth, work and service to others.

Chris Walker < http://www.chriswalker.com.au/ > is a visionary business consultant and of the world's leading facilitators of Personal/Professional Development. Author, consultant and professional speaker, his considered a leader in the field of human potential and lifestyles for success. His VIP and Mastery Programs have been attended by thousands of individuals around the world seeking tools to live life and manage their careers to their fullest potential. http://www.chriswalker.com.au/

Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/?expert=Chris_J_Walker

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Will I Get Married? 3 Crazy Facts About Falling in Love You Have to See to Believe!

Who else is wondering whether they'll ever get married? Do the years seem to be passing and you're NOT making progress with picking a partner? Does your life feel complete in just about every way outside of your romantic relationships? The simple truth is, as our lives get more complicated than ever before.... more and more people are pushing back, and postponing marriage until later and later in life.

But the fact remains, most people DO still get married... and if you never have, or have put it off PAST a certain point in your life, the undeniable truth is you are probably growing increasingly self conscious that you're still single! (especially if you've got parents like mine..:-)

Here is a striking fact that you must NOT ignore if you're hopeful... but nowhere close to meeting your soulmate.

According to recent studies, almost 9 out of EVERY 10 women is married by the age of 40. (86%) And 8 out every 10 men is also likely to find himself "hitched" by the time he hits the big FOUR-oh.

The scary thing? If you're one of those who is still hopeful and optimistic BUT has hit that magic number without being hitched... your chances of making it happen are going DOWN in a big way, with each passing year..:-) Which means if you want to make it happen, you BETTER get your behind in gear!

Ready for 3 MORE "crazy" facts about falling in love you really ought to know?

1 - SMART people "say I DO!"

It's true... the higher your IQ, the more likely it is that you've got a permanent partner! Is it because smarter people are more practical, or more passionate? Who KNOWS... but the fact remains, that if you've big brains, the chances are you are married! (and the lower your IQ, the more likely it is that you're still single and will stay that way forever!)

2 - Prison and PASSION

This one is really WEIRD, but true! One of the most receptive groups of men to get married? Prisoners! (and not to each other, either..:-) The fact is, a man who has done prison time is exceptionally likely to get married at least once. (Over 90% of men who have been incarcerated will marry!) Is it a support system, or comfort, or simply that prisoners are simply more likely to be PASSIONATE and commitment oriented than men who have never had the same unfortunate experience? It's a good question, and one I'm hoping MY boyfriend doesn't have to experience to find out!

3 - Oddly... .The ARMY leads to Amore! (especially for WOMEN!)

Want to hear a strange one? Women who serve in the armed forces, are 200 times more likely to marry, than women who don't? Why? Again....who knows? But our resident love astrologer says it's NOT for any reasons other than passion and proximity. If you want to have your lot of men to choose from... the smartest strategy? Go where there are lots of men! (and the army is certainly as good of a spot for that as any..:-)

Of course there are LOTS more crazy facts about love that will shock, surprise, amaze and confuse you. My FAVORITE? People who get a love compatibility horoscope reading are 75% more likely to meet their soulmate than those who don't! Of course that's just MY experience with love, romance and the stars... but it's a number I'd take to the bank any day of the week to boot!

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Dealing With Heartbreak - Discover the EASIEST Way to Get Over a Broken Heart (Weird But True!)

What is the best way to deal with heartbreak?

What should I do if the love of my life tells me he (or she) does NOT want to see me ever again? We've all been there at one point or another... on the receiving end of hearing the shocking news that someone we really love doesn't feel the same way... or even if they do, they choose NOT to continue expressing it in the context of a romantic relationship.

I can remember the first time this happened to me... and the pain is STILL palpable! For many of us, rejection is the absolute worst emotion to endure... and when you couple that with the feelings of loss, and jealously and "aloneness" and the idea of having to go BACK to square one, you often have a recipe for a complete emotional meltdown!

The good news? It doesn't HAVE to be that way... and if you are able to frame the loss as a new beginning, or that proverbial NEW door of opportunity opening, it casts an entirely new light on the experience.

For many people, talking to a spiritual relationship advisor, or an emotional intuitive or empathy can be the KEY to recovering your sense of self, when the relationship ends.

Why? Let's look at a few reasons why I believe that speaking to an empathetic and objective intuitive advisor is the BEST way to getting your life back on track, after a relationship ends.

Most people believe that when a significant relationship ends... life as they know it has ended. The truth is, that's rarely the case, and far more frequently, people go on to learn powerful lessons from "failed" relationships that help make future ones, much better!

An emotional intuitive or empathetic relationship advisor will give you OBJECTIVE advice, not colored by judgment or previous relationships, or BAGGAGE that you bring to the conversation. For better or for worse, even the folks who love us most can't really give us the advice that helps us move on when a relationship ends... simply because they are attached to us, or have some sort of other "investment" in the relationship that's ended. (our parents, his parents, our best friends, her best friends, etc)

A spiritual advisor is able to give you the BIG picture perspective. Your life is NOT defined by one relationship, one failure, one fight, one mistake, or even one "true love". Learning to at least be OPEN to the idea of karma or the notion that your life is a rich tapestry of powerful experiences that shape your journey, is KEY to evolving as a person. (and if you are so inclined... a spiritual being as well)

The truth is, you DO have the power to overcome heartbreak, and if you are ready, you CAN start today!

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Codependent Relationships - The Love Addiction

Often termed the love addiction, Codependent relationships can be complex at the best of times. If you are the codependent, you may find yourself lavishing a great deal of time and energy on your partner, obsessively caring for them and sorting out any problems for them. In a way, you begin to control or manipulate them even if without intent. There will be a strong desire to protect, cherish and cure-all and this situation can be overwhelmingly intense for all concerned.

Codependent relationships occur when one or both partners have issues often formed and deeply rooted within their childhood. Dysfunctional families and the lessons learned within these family groups often begin to emerge throughout adulthood and can have a devastating effect on the codependent and their family unit. Sadly, this cycle of destructive emotional behavior is often passed down from generation to generation unless you make the conscious decision to stop.

There are variables within the codependency umbrella of course and your reactions or behaviors will be very much relevant to the lessons absorbed in those early days and lessons learned through previous relationships.

Typical codependent symptoms include:

Achieving fulfillment through being needed by othersFeeling hurt or resentful if you are not neededChanging your behaviors if in an abusive relationship so that your actions do not cause anger or upset the abuserGiving up your own interests or hobbies for the sake of your relationshipManipulating your partner through an intense need to be in control

Quite often the codependent experiences an intrinsic lack of self-esteem and confidence and if this mirrors how you are feeling inside, you may well be aware that control that you seek masks a great deal of pain inside. Abandonment or rejection issues may be the pinnacle on which your codependency sits.

Essentially, any codependent relationship is an unhealthy one and often people are drawn together because instinctively they recognize familiar behavioral traits and as such, understanding why you are continuously drawn to a relationship that is likely to be unhealthy is extremely important.

Acknowledging that there is a problem is an essential part of any recovery process and it is not always easy to do because familiarity and well-worn behavioral paths offers you security of sorts. Seeking professional help is the next vital step and so is identifying a counselor who is trained in this area. Just remember that it is not an overnight process, and this is because your behaviors and feelings are potentially so deeply ingrained within your everyday thoughts and actions, that the counselor is likely to have to help you unravel many emotional knots.

A love addiction is strong even whilst it may not be healthy. It's not easy to simply walk away or to change, but with professional help you can start to open yourself up to more loving and honest associations and move away from codependent relationships permanently.

Jim Moustakas is the CEO of My Life Assistant Pty Ltd an online counseling and life coaching interactive platform. My Life Assistant provides a live 24 hour counseling or coaching service by qualified counselors, psychologists and life coaches from around the world. To get full access now please visit http://www.mylifeassistant.com/SignUp.aspx select whether you are a general user or a therapist and get started right away.

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Relationships That Are Going Nowhere

One of the saddest circumstances to be caught up in is a relationship that doesn't seem to be going anywhere. Each party has just sort of snuggled into a stalemate pattern. It is almost like being in limbo.?

This type of situation is a life waster. Years go by where couples are merely content. Love surely is not meant to be this way. Also, it doesn't mean that the spark of love has gone out, but it does mean though it needs to be fanned where it will burn brightly once again. It isn't going to happen though unless you recognize the problem and take some steps in the right direction.

First you need to determine that the feelings that are still there are mutual. You don't want to be wasting efforts with a partner who has no interest in salvaging a loving relationship. This can only be determined with a heart to heart talk. Most often in a relationship that has become complacent, there haven't been any real talks in a very long time. This is a good starting point.

Once you are sure that there are feelings there to be kindled, then you have two steps to take.

The first step:

Is to draw attention to yourself once again. Take a walk down memory lane. What was it about you that drew your partner to you in the first place? Now you may be thinking it was your good looks, or your great figure that isn't so great anymore, but these features are just the calling cards. They are really not what triggers the love. If they did, and the love is lost because you don't possess them anymore, then your partner isn't worth having. You now have to create a pizazz with what you have now. If you have gotten into the habit of serving dinner in your track pants, then how about dressing up just a little. Start taking some subtle steps to make yourself more noticeable.

The second step:

Take a hard look at your partner. What was it that they had that you found so appealing. Look deep for this once again, because its still there, you have just lost it. Start focusing on these, and when its close to the time for your partner to come home, think about these and you will pre-set the mood.

These are the starters. If you continually focus on all the old flame starters you will start looking for some that are in the here and now. Before you know you may not only rekindle the old relationship but have one that far supersedes it.

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In Love - Change Your Luck

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How to Make Her Fall in Love - What to Do When Nothing Seems to Be Working

It's one of the most common scenarios out there. You know a woman who you find really attractive, and more than anything else, you want to make her fall in love with you. You keep on thinking about her, how beautiful she is, how good you feel when you are around her and you realize that you are falling pretty hard for her. So, you dig in to your bag of tricks and you start doing all of the things that you just know will make her feel the same way for you. There's only one problem.

Nothing seems to be working for you.

In fact, the harder you try to make her fall in love with you, it seems like she is getting further and further away from you. That's okay, you are confident that you can make her feel the same way about you. So, you do a little more and a little more to try and win her over. Still, nothing seems to be working.

Now, you are frustrated. Actually, you are more than frustrated. You are disappointed. You start to wonder whether or not you will ever be able to make her fall for you. But, it does not look like it is happening at all.

What can you do when you want to make a woman fall for you, but nothing seems to be working?

If you keep on trying and trying, all you are going to do is make the situation worse for yourself. With some exceptions here and there, most women find it to be a big turn off when a man is obviously trying to hard to win them over. And if you are not just trying to hard, but you are doing things that make her feel like you are invading on her life or in her space, you can count on her wanting very little to do with you.

One of the most POWERFUL things that you can do at this moment, is to pull away from her. Look, if you keep on pushing, eventually you are going to push her away for good. The reason why pulling away is so powerful, is because it is the OPPOSITE of what most guys will do. Most guys will try to keep coming up with things to try and impress her, and eventually they will just turn her off.

Don't be a fool for love, you don't have to...

If you pull away, then you are going to at least be saving yourself from acting like a fool, trying to convince her that she should fall for you. Another thing happens though when you pull away in a situation like that. She will start to wonder WHY you pulled away. She will start to think about you, and probably even do things to try and pull you back. When that happens, it's no longer just a one sided thing. And that is how you are going to be able to make her fall in love, even if right now nothing seems to be working.

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Test Your Love Compatibility: How to Know You Are 100% Right For Each Other Almost Immediately

Who else is just starting a new relationship, and is starting to really feel the "pitter patter" of passion? Are you really excited about the prospects that he (or she) MIGHT be the one? Are you nervous that there's going to be a shoe to drop, or you're going to find out too LATE that they're really NOT all that compatible after all? And like many of us, are you worried that's going to happen AFTER you've already fallen in love... or at least in LUST, and when it may be too late to back out easily without BREAKING a heart, or having YOURS broken in the process?

In this article we are going to talk about how to discover if your partner is right for you almost INSTANTLY, while using time tested albeit "weird" tools and techniques that 99% of relationships will never tap into it. (but should, and if they DID, there would be a whole lot LESS heartbreak in the world)

Curious to know more? Sounds great... but be prepared, these are NOT techniques for the meek, or the close minded..:-) Read on as we take a closer look below!

Energetic Compatibility Test:

What is it? Very simple. It's a timeless technique for comparing your AURA, or subtle energy field, to his. The truth is, whether you are a true blue believer, or die hard skeptic, we ALL have an emotional field which emits a certain amount energy that can be read. Science, while always skeptical of this... is now coming around and calling it "quantum energy" or "subtle energy". Psychics, mystics, astrologers and artists have called the very same thing your AURA for thousands of years..:-) Like it or not, in it's natural state, energy attracts it's equal. And there are thousands of qualified, insightful and AMAZING energy intuitives who can literally read your aura simply by listening to the sound of your voice. They can also tell you what is in your emotional energetic future, and what is currently in it's "field", which is a GREAT way of knowing if you've got authentic LOVE in your life, or just old fashioned bad luck.

(And don't laugh... there are PLENTY of serious scientific studies that validate what love intuitives have been saying for lifetimes!)

Astrological Compatibility

Believe me, a good astrological horoscope is an AMAZING tool for finding your soulmate... and for finding out if the partner in your life right now is IT! To be perfectly honest with you, even being a bit of a new age enthusiast, I was still a hard headed skeptic until I had THIS particular process done. To make a long story short, I had an astrological love reading done 10 years into a serious relationship... and all of the signs not only pointed to him being DEAD wrong for me, but suggested someone ELSE in my life was right! Suffice it to say, I obviously ignored this advice until one day I came home to find my man LONG gone... without even a note. (I did get a phone call a week later... after 10 years I guess he decided I deserved that..:-) Would you believe I bumped into the co-worker the astrologist "predicted" I would match with just 3 nights later while buying a new round of Kleenex to cry in? It's true... and MY happy story officially began on that very night!

Are these techniques weird and unorthodox?

Absolutely! Do they WORK like magic? You better believe they do. I truly believe that each of us has a unique karmic connection that we're HERE to discover, and as long as we keep our mind open, the UNIVERSE will conspire to help us find them! (but nothing happen will happen UNLESS you try!) If you are willing to be open minded and put your HEART on the line, you'll find that true LOVE will find you, almost 100% of the time, if you are open to let it in.

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Fall in Love for Summer! 3 Easy Ways to Find Your Soulmate (3 Is Weird, But It Really Works!)

Who else is ready to fall in love? Are you sick and tired of focusing time, energy and effort on work, or responsibilities or daily chores that have made life start to feel like a GRIND? Do you find yourself often alone in moments where you crave company and companionship? Do you wonder why so many other people have such amazing luck when it comes to love......when YOURS seems stuck like "chuck"? Want to know the truth? You may feel lonely.....but you've got A LOT of company! According to a recent Gallup poll.......as our lives have become busier, and while we "seem" more connected, the truth is, those of us who are NOT in a relationship feel more alone than ever before.

The good news? There are easy ways to recapture the spark in your spirit....and finally find the LOVE and romance you've been looking for all along. And there is NO better time of year to fall in love (or LUST) than SUMMER!

Let's take a quick look at 3 of my FAVORITE ways to make it happen....and in a hurry!

The Digital Dating Revolution (It's NOT so Strange Anymore!)

Want to know the truth? I was at a wedding a few weeks ago, where the chaplain said that he now does more weddings due to relationships that began through online dating sites, than any other conventional method there is. I don't care how old you are.....or how many failed relationships you've been through. If you've got the DESIRE to date, you can meet your match online. Even better? No matter how picky or particular you are, there are specific "niche" dating sites set up to accommodate your needs, be they quirky or conventional! (and trust me.....I've tried a few of both!)

The Wisdom of Crowds (Get INVOLVED!)

I'm often NOT a person who loves getting lost in a crowd. But when it comes to meeting new people and falling in love, there is no better way than to get involved in groups of people who share your passion....and purpose and enjoy the same things you do. Summer is just about the BEST time of year to get involved in activities and events you have passion for....simply because there are so many things happening! For example? I've had 2 friends get married in the past year from quirky community groups they joined last summer. (1 a meditation group that met in a park every week to breathe.....and the other, a psychic development class - go figure!)

Get a LOVE Compatibility Reading (Don't laugh......they REALLY work!)

Speaking of psychic development, did you know that having a love compatibility reading can improve your odds of falling (and staying) in love by over 50%? It's true....and an emotional intuitive or even love astrological reading can do WONDERS for your romantic self confidence It can re-affirm your emotional instincts and clarify EXACTLY what you already know in your gut.....but haven't admitted out loud.

I'm a huge believer that we each have a unique karmic connection to the universe and to each other....and that there is ONE special soul out there waiting for each of us. Your destiny IS to find and fall in love. Unfortunately, for many of us, we're too BUSY (or exhausted) to get out and get it..:-) Sound like YOU?

If it does.......and you are anything like ME, a love compatibility reading is about the easiest way to get BACK on track...and make it happen in a hurry!

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How to Find True Love: 3 SECRETS To Finding Your Soulmate (BEFORE He Gets Away Forever)

Who else is looking for true love? That even sounds like a silly question to ask, doesn't it? I don't care if you are in a relationship now, single or just getting to know someone new, there is NO more universal truth than the desire to be loved. I don't care how skeptical or cynical you are as well... deep down, we all believe that there is ONE true love out there in the wild and wacky world for each of us, and somewhere in that space, we all understand that it's our true life's purpose to find that one special soul.

I'm going to give you a few very specific secret strategies for finding our soulmate from my OWN experience. Some of them may sound unorthodox, unusual or even downright weird. The good news is that they ALL work... and if your head, heart and spirit are OPEN, they'll all work for you as well. Curious to know more? Continue reading as we take a closer look!

1 - Create a Composite (Start HERE!)

What does your soulmate look like? What does he smell like... feel like, and sound like? The vast majority of women will never really "flesh out" a picture of her perfect partner... she'll just lament the fact that she's never met him! The truth is, you can't really ask for something that you can't quite visualize, and you certainly aren't going to meet the man of your dreams, if you don't know EXACTLY "who" he is. I advise everyone who enjoys my advice to start by visualizing her perfect, ideal man in great detail, and even writing "him down" on paper. Knowing who he is, is an important part of knowing WHERE he is, which we'll cover a bit more in #2 below..:-)

2 - Community Compatibility

It amazes me how many people, especially women, look for love in "all the wrong places". How many times have you heard a single woman who hangs out in bars say... I'll never meet a guy I can fall in love with in a bar"? If you are serious about finding your soulmate... and you feel that way, WHY then... hang out in bars and nightclubs? Go to the places that the people you DO want to meet congregate. Remember... each of us is unique, and that place may be different for ME, than it is for you. Choose communities to gravitate to that are most likely to be made up of the people you truly want to bond with, and you'll be AMAZED at how quickly the universe rewards with you with a mate who matches your deepest desires..:-)

3 - Look Above

I truly believe that there is a KARMA of connection. A spiritual component to your special soulmate. You don't need to be religious to believe this... you just need to be OPEN to the idea that your life has a purpose, and a plan, and that the Universe plays a part in helping you shape your destiny. I love the famous quote by Ralph Waldo Emerson - "Once you make a decision, the universe conspires to make it happen". This sums of EVERYTHING I believe about finding true love, and your soulmate, and the easiest way to do this is to get HELP from someone who is uniquely gifted to see what the stars have in store for you, once you are BRAVE enough to ask for help.

(sounds silly to some... but to those of us who know, it's the easiest way to find your soulmate that there is!)

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Tears, Two Kinds of Love and Being Inside Another's Skin

Tears Are Enough

When we're swamped in the mess of life, tears are enough.

They sate the spirit's desire for absolution at the behest of the irreconcilable.

Tears are requiem enough for the losses we endure.

Frankly, they're all we have - they emend misplaced guilt, and most guilt is misplaced, because it's often the sanctity of love gone wrong. Sometimes we make mistakes because we love. We certainly grieve because we love.

In adjusting to life as it happens, today, know that the tears of a trillion flecks of emotion are always enough.

Then, healing commences, remains... continues.

Slowly God is known; the humble peace that transcribes understanding into language we can partake of.
We nod quietly in agreement - our worlds are a mess, but God stands by us. Tears are the Lord's gift for coping, adjusting to, and honouring such a confused and often overwhelming life.

Tender Love and Tough Love

Trust is a huge contingency in all successful relationships.

As we relate with people - loved ones, fellows, colleagues and peers - it is only a matter of time before the smoothed words and faked smiles bridge the chasm of authenticity... then, can the relationship survive the impending conflict? Trust, as has been mentioned, is the key.

We cannot enjoy the saliency of tender love without enduring, first, the agency of tough love.

In more plain terms, if the relationship cannot get past the awkward truths that threaten to stifle it, it cannot enjoy the flourishing trust and respect that necessarily profits from the fire of genuine rapport.

So, tough love comes first. Well... first inauthentic love - then trust-issued conflict veiled as tough love - then, conditional on humble reception, tender love as a result of tough love.

We can know the true sense of 'brothers and sisters in arms' type of love only after enduring the darkest days that awaken the dawn.

Whether it's walking in someone else's moccasins or insisting on truth in relationships, we can know there is a time for both if the relationship is real.

Climbing Inside Another's Skin

The shut-in patient lies there coldly, but only as it seems, inclined as they are on their bed, awake but unable to respond. Family are there in abundance. Doctors and nurses too. The mood is harsh with consternation. Everyone it appears has a view of what the patient needs.

Yet how can they know?

The science of trial and error is imposed on the patient. They're the ones experiencing the pain and discomfort, not to mention exposure; dignity has been sold for a long forgotten pittance.

How many act in courageous empathy... bold compassion... love by broad means?

How must it feel for the person laying on that bed... the person with feelings just like you and I?
God asks us to see from their eyes... to hear from their ears... to sense as only they'd sense... to climb inside their skin.

How's it sound, look or feel from there?

Copyright (c) 2011 S. J. Wickham.

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Trust Between The Sexes

Trust is the intangible X factor that makes relationships work, eases problems and allows you to fully share your feelings, thoughts and emotions with a lover. It can never be bought, only given and is easily lost.
How can trust be maintained and if necessary, repaired between men and women?

Trust is actually based on four elements of risk assessment which we all unconsciously make about our partner. These are:

1. Sincerity
Do you mean what you say? Or, are you guilty of saying something without the clear intention of follow through.

2. Reliability
Do you say you'll do something or be somewhere and then don't or can't? These can seem like small misdemeanors but you will be subconsciously judged on your follow through. It's always better not to agree to something you can't be sure you'll be able to do.

3. Competence
This is the assessment made about whether they think you have the ability to do what you say you can.

4. Care
Do you have the other person's "best interests" at heart as much as your own when you make your decisions and take action? Most people very quickly pick up on this, even if they can't explain what's wrong.

All this risk assessment is generally taking place below the level of the conscious mind and will be strongly influenced by any past history between the two people involved. The end result will be an amorphous gut feeling about you which is almost impossible for your partner to ignore unless you do something to break through this unconscious process with new information which suggests an alternative possibility.

So, how do you arrest the process when you've made a mistake and lost your loved ones trust?

Here's the deal! When you've done something less than brilliant (and we all have) firstly, admit it to yourself. This is the hardest part. Don't sneakily hide it or blame the other person and think you've got away with it, because, you won't have. Trust will have been lost and even if nothing is openly said; once trust is damaged you won't easily be trusted again. The only thing for it is to come clean and accept responsibility for your personal failure in the situation. Then, and this is the most important part, name how you will handle similar issues in the future. And, make sure, come hell or high water that you follow through. This is a trustworthy stance and the only way to break through the risk assessment process we've discussed above.

Remember that a small disappointment handled well can actually build trust and a big one is either going to ultimately destroy the relationship or take major changes on your part in order to move forward again.

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Love Tips for Guys - You CAN Choose Who You Fall in Love With

As someone who frequently gets asked questions about and advice on love, dating, and relationships... one of the more frustrating things that I get to see is just how many people fall in love with the WRONG person. And it goes both ways, it's not just women falling for the wrong guys. Guys do it too. They fall in love with the wrong woman, and it ends up making their life a nightmare. What gets to be most frustrating is seeing how many people believe that they just cannot help who they fall in love with.

You CAN choose who you fall in love with.

While the feeling can kind of seem instantaneous, most of the time it is a lot more gradual than that. Meaning, you don't meet a woman and 5 minutes later fall in love. It takes time, you have to actively seek out spending time with her. And the more time you DO spend with a woman... the more likely it is that you will fall for her.

So, why is this important for YOU?

Imagine yourself in a relationship with a woman who cheated on you. And she did it time and time again, and you always take her back because you feel like you love her and that feeling makes you accept her indiscretions. Sound like a nightmare, right? Well, that happens all of the time and it always boils down to this idea that you cannot help who you fall for.

Here's another scenario which is rather common. You are in a relationship with a woman who does not let you have a life outside of her. Going to football games with your buddies, hanging out and shooting pool, all of those things are off limits because she needs you to always be around her. Again, kind of a nightmare, right?

It's VERY common. And when I ask the reason why guys allow themselves to be in a relationship like that, the answer almost always has to do with the fact that she is the one they fell for and they don't think that they can change that feeling.

My advice:

Learn to qualify women before you start spending so much time and energy on a relationship with them. It's much easier to cut ties with a woman when you are aware of who she really is, and you have not invested a lot of time into a relationship. And realize that you can choose who you fall for. You can choose which women you approach, which ones you ask out on a date, and which ones you decide to commit to.

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5 Steps - To Get Your Ex-Girlfriend Back

If you're really considering trying to get your ex-girlfriend back, then you still have hope. I have put together five simple steps to succeed. Breaking up could be heartbreaking but don't stay stuck in this moment. There is a great lesson to be learned no matter whose fault it was. Every situation has a fix, now it's up to you to potentially put your heart to it and start to rekindle your broken relationship back together.

1- If you want to win your ex-girlfriend back, start by writing her touching letter. Take your time and pour your heart to her. Write how much you care about her and how much you enjoyed the good times together. Stay away from writing anything negative, stay as positive as you can.

2- Reach out to her after a couple of days by phone. Ask her if she received your letter and how she's doing. This will let her know you're still interested in being part of her life. If she doesn't answer the phone, send her a text message and wait for her response. She will appreciate that at least you're trying.

3- Another important thing you want to make sure is that you're staying away from other women. You don't want to get distracted if you still want to work things out with your ex-girlfriend. Continue stay focused on your ex-girlfriend and positive. If you continue to follow these steps you're getting closer and closer to winning her heart back.

4- Remember to bring up happy memories when you speak to your ex-girlfriend. If there is an important date coming up during your break-up send her a nice e-card regarding that special date. Let her know you're thinking about her without any reason to or send her a thinking of you card in the mail.

5- Continue to stay in touch with your ex-girlfriend. This will show her you're still interested in her and would like to still work things out. If she only wants to be friends for now until you both work out each other's differences then you're at least on a good start. Get on her good side and let her see that you have indeed made some progress on your behalf. Once she starts to see that you're contributing to the relationship, she will start to rekindle things with you as well.

These five steps helped me get back with my ex-girlfriend. I didn't see results right away, but it was all worth waiting for. Within two weeks we were back together. I wish you the best!

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Spiritual Soul Mates and the 1 Sure Fire Sign He Is the ONE (Don't Let YOURS Slip Away Forever)

Does he really love me? What are the signs? Will he tell me if I ask... or do I literally need to read his mind to find out what he REALLY thinks about me, the relationship and our future together? And why do some women seem SO happy in love... while the rest of us struggle, settle and accept LESS than we deserve in live, and in love?

Any of these questions sound familiar? If you are anything like the vast majority of women in relationships that FEEL good, but don't quite feel 100% "certain", you know how draining and emotionally exhausting it can be to simply NOT know for sure.

The good news? There are are lots of unconventional signs that a man loves you, is committed and WILL be there for the long haul, even if he's NOT the type to open up and admit it out loud.

With that in mind, and as someone who has personally experienced the highs and lows of being a relationship where I simply had NO confidence it was going to last... I'm going to share with you the one VERY unorthodox technique that changed my perspective on PASSION (and purpose) in MY relationships... forever!

Filed Under: Karmic Connections (And the EASIEST Way to Tell if You've Got One)

I believe that everyone reading this right now has a unique, special, and "cosmic" karmic connection with ONE specific soul. There is ONE person who is destined to be part of the fabric of your future... and whose life and purpose and reason for being is deeply interwoven with your own. YOU have a spiritual soulmate... and your destiny is to find that one person and live in a state of unconditional love, bliss and happiness.

Will that person MAGICALLY appear in my life?

Great question. And absolutely not..:-) The truth is, one of the biggest misconceptions about finding our spiritual partner or "other half" is the idea that just because we have a destiny, or a certain amount of "love karma" that the UNIVERSE is going to make all of this happen for us, "auto-magically". Real life, instead... is full of bumps in the road, lessons learned the hard way and the harsh fact that MOST of us will not recognize the gifts that are given, simply because we're too busy focusing on the things that are unimportant, meaningless and ultimately, disappointing.

And there is NO area that this is more obvious than finding true love.

The 1 sure fire sign that he is your KARMIC connection and spiritual soulmate?

You'll have a energetic connection that transcends the physical. An inexplicable emotional "rapport" that is hard to describe, feels psychic and deeply intuitive, and yet you both feel to your very core. In short - Your aura's will "align". Even if it's just a friendship right now... you will feel a deep bond of "knowing" that just is!

Unfortunately, most women will laugh this off... pretend it's just a fairy tale or even ignore it altogether, simply because they are in a relationship with someone else. (usually a BAD one, too) Many people are skeptical about aura's, soul-mates and karma, too! I'm here to tell you that the HAPPIEST relationships that I know are with 2 people who truly recognize that they are spiritual partners in the purest sense of the word... and share a bond that no scientist or skeptic can explain!

One last thing...

Always go with your gut. Your own instincts... and intuition hold MORE keys to your karma than any article like this one you'll ever read. These are just the sign posts in the road... the POINTERS to help you find your own truth, your own passion, and hopefully... if I've even touched a tiny truth you know to be true, a gentle nudge to help YOU find what you're looking for, in life and in LOVE alike!

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How To Get Your Ex Boyfriend Back - Great Tips

It hurts, doesn't it? You were happy as could be when suddenly, wham! He's gone and left you brokenhearted. It feels like the end of the world, but it doesn't have to. Here are some tips that can help you not only get him back, but also make you feel a lot better.

Take a look at your behavior first. Are you bombarding him with text messages, emails, and phone calls every five minutes? Do you create a scene whenever or wherever you meet? If this is what you're doing, please stop right now. This behavior is completely counter productive, it can also become a nuisance and downright scary. It goes against human nature to respond positively to this type of harassment, and it is likely your ex will back off even further.

You need to be cool, and ignore him for a while. If you do happen to meet be casual and friendly. He'll start to wonder "Hey, what's going on here?" and having no need to be defensive, he'll relax. He will find you easy to talk to and so, to think of you and maybe remember good times you had together and why he fell in love with you in the first place.

It's also absolutely necessary for you to dedicate time to yourself. You must go out and have some fun. Obviously you will not want to start dating, but you need to see your girl friends, grab a bite to eat, catch a movie. Remember that your friends are your support network. As long as you don't overdo the "poor me" subject, and both show and feel interest in their lives as well, friends are a very necessary part of the healing process.

Start a new interest. Put your name down for that cooking class you always wanted to take, or do an art appreciation course, or whatever you like. Don't stay at home waiting for the phone to ring. Improve your social life and your skills. As you work on these challenges you will have little time and energy left for grieving over the break up. After a few weeks you will be amazed at the change in your life. That's the time to reassess your feelings for your ex. Do you still miss him enough to want him back? Or are you happy to carry on as you are?

If you do decide you still want him back, you must plan a strategy that avoids the mistakes you made before the break up. Go over your previous relationship with him carefully, trying to pinpoint what caused it to end, and what you need to avoid.

When you do meet he will no longer feel afraid of what you will do, so he?ll be friendly. Avoid making your feelings too obvious, and keep your distance. Try to be a little mysterious and a little hard to get to get him thinking about what he has lost, and let him make the first move.

Don't play games. Be honest about your feelings and don't play with him. This is a decidedly nasty and dangerous thing to do. It is always important to follow the golden rule of relationships: treat others as you would have them treat you.

I'm sure that after following these steps you will not be needing any more tips to get your ex boyfriend back.

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Is He the ONE? The "WEIRD" Confession That MAY Change Your Mind Forever!

Who else is curious if they're man really loves them? Is he REALLY the "one"... or are you settling for something far less than you crave in your gut? Do you feel confident and secure in your relationship? Or maybe like many women, you feel that uncomfortable butterfly of uncertainty bouncing around in your belly whenever you wonder what he's REALLY thinking?

No matter how confident you are in your relationship, and your boyfriend, husband or lover, there is NO woman who knows with 100% certitude that their man is truly as much in love as she believes... let alone is being faithful.

Here are some ASTONISHING things I've learned as an emotional intuitive, and as a love counselor and confidante to men and women of ALL types and stripes over the years.

Women are FAR more likely to be faithful, honest and committed... as long as the relationship is solid.

As the relationship grows and evolves, it's actually the WOMAN who is far more likely to start entertaining thoughts of straying, or confiding in another person, than her man is.

Simply stated... a woman has FAR greater needs than our male counterparts due, and that applies to emotional needs, physical needs and spiritual needs to boot.

Believe it or not though... even when unfulfilled, most women will STILL stay monogamous.

Men can be happy as a lamb at home... and yet still cheat anyway, without giving it much of a second thought.

And...

Men are MOST likely to be MORE devastated when a relationship comes to an end, simply because they haven't accumulated the tools to take care of themselves, quite as much as we have!

What do I recommend you do if you aren't sure?

Talk to someone! A close friend, a confidante, an objective family member who WON'T tell you what you want to hear. As an emotional intuitive and empath, I recommend you reach out to someone with similar gifts who will HELP you find what it is that you crave, want and need.

The key is NOT to settle. Don't allow yourself to accept a man who is "there", rather than one who will BE there... regardless of what may come. And lastly... and I know this sounds silly or "out there" to some of you, but compare your compatibility by AURA and energy and spiritual connection as well! It can make all the difference in the world. (and a spiritual intuitive can help you make that happen in a hurry!)

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Love at First Sight - Reality or Fantasy?

You never get a second chance at making a great first impression. Research has shown us that you make a decision within the first 10 seconds of meeting someone about whether you like them, or not, and about whether you want to pursue a relationship with them or really can't be bothered at all.

After that it really is just confirming that your first impression was actually correct which then makes it almost impossible to change.

In truth you're not much different to those in the animal world. For example when two cats meet each other for the first time they, just as quickly as we do, decide if the other cat is a threat to them or not. If the other cat is perceived as a threat then the first cat will hiss and snarl at the second. The second cat then is likely to bristle up, in an attempt to make it appear larger, at the reaction of the first in a show of aggression and for preparing it for fight or flight.

If on the other hand the first cat feels no threat he will more likely go up to the other cat and "sniff" him. If the response is positive then you may be surprised to watch them nudging each other with their bodies and licking each other while purring contentedly.

We are just animals after all!

Humans are really not much different. And, just as cats, you also use all of your senses, including your sense of smell, to assess in a flash how you feel about this other person.

Allan Pease in his book, "Body Language" notes some of the physical attributes of humans as they respond to meeting another person for the first time. These physical attributes may be different depending on whether your first assessment is positive or negative.

Allan Pease speaks about how you position your body. If you like the person your body will be more open in posture and pointed towards the other person. Obviously you will be more likely to smile, to show that you are not threatening in any way. And did you know that your pupils also enlarge making you potentially irresistibly attractive.

If you like the look of the other person you are even likely to expose to the other person the softer parts of your body. This is particularly so for women and may include the inside of your wrists or your necks. Men, you are more likely to direct her attention to your "manhood" by standing akimbo with your hands tucked into your belt or in some other pose that reflects how strong and manly you are.

These responses are all spontaneous, that is done without your even knowing it because they are part of a very primitive reaction that taught you very quickly and intuitively what to and what not to do to attract attention as you wanted it or not.

So what is there to learn from this?

Simply this - you can learn to manage theses responses and use them to your advantage. Obviously it's important to watch out for any threatening signals from the other that would let you know that this is someone you should not be with. But if you feel safe then go ahead and enjoy playing the game.

The name of the game?

It's nothing more than simple "flirtation", and if you know what you are doing it can be a great party game. And if the first impression is a good one then the "fall" into love is simply irresistible.

The magic of this first meeting will be forever remembered and cherished as a promise to "happy ever after". This is of course a fantasy but one you are all too eager to get into again and again and again. So much so that some of you may even come to realize you are addicted to it and will go from one relationship to another seeking more of the good feelings that those first moments produce.

So until next time - Relate with Love

Lidy Seysener

About the Author

As a qualified Counselor, Lidy Seysener specializes in helping individuals and couples make the most of their lives and their relationships. She's been Counseling for more than twenty years and can also boast having been in an enduring relationship for as long.

For more information about me or what I do take a look at my newest website: http://www.acouplesjourney.com/ where you will find lots more information including quizzes and questionnaires. enter your details and you will get a free copy of my limited edition ebook titled 'Relationships - A Couples Journey'.

? 2010 Lidy Seysener - all rights reserved

Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/?expert=Lidy_W_Seysener

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Finding Mr, Mrs Or Ms Right - Be Passionate About You

So many men and women tell me they want a mate in their life. Some just do not want to be alone. Others think it will make their life easier. While many others just want to have someone with whom to share their life. How many of you have considered the possibility of sharing yourself? I believe at the deepest of levels we as humans, are made to connect and not to be alone. However, I also believe that in order to truly connect with another person, we must first be connected to ourselves. We must know who we are at all levels, accept and love what is there. It's not just me who believes this, ask any dating or relationship coaches, and they will tell you the same.

When we take the time to know what is important to us, to tap into our heart and embrace our passions, we have so much more to offer someone else. When we are willing to offer the whole of ourselves with honesty and trust, then we attract someone who also is willing to do the same. When we are living our lives fully, embracing all that life has to offer we are sending a message of happiness and gratitude to the world. The universe responds in kind. What you put your attention on grows stronger in your life, so if your attention is on lack, need, loneliness, rather than on contentment, acceptance, and passion then don't be surprised with the results.

Being alone is an opportunity to embrace the beauty of who you are, to see the gift of yourself, to enjoy your own company, to find what makes you tick, to discover what you are most passionate about in this life.

Being alone is a gift to yourself to fine-tune what it means to live your life whether alone or with another. If you do not enjoy your own company, how in the world do you expect someone else to enjoy you?

If you are bored and lonely and cannot see the joy in this moment regardless of what you are doing or who you are with, then what makes you think someone else can change that for you? When you are clear about who you are and what is important to you, and put attention on those things, your life will be fulfilling and rewarding.

When I was a teenager, I received a card with the following line included as part of the poem, "If you are not happy with what you've got, how can you be happy with more?" This makes so much sense to me and has been a reminder for me all these years to be present and grateful for whom I am and what I have whenever I find myself complaining.

Are you excited about sharing yourself with another who complements you, or are you desperate to share your life with someone? Can you see the difference between the two? In the first you are present, alive, whole, and very attractive, confident that you will wait for the right one. In the second you are sad, wanting, needing, and willing to take anyone. Who would you rather BEE- attractive and confident or needy and desperate? Conversely what kind of mate do you want to attract? Be the love you are seeking and you will find it.

If you are not happy with yourself and your life, how will you attract a mate who is happy with themselves or with you, for that matter?

Two happy people create a happy couple.

Take the time alone to get to know who you are, your values, your passions, and what is important to you. Enjoy you! Love you! Embrace you! Then get ready for magic.

I LOVE my life!! I love my family Sunday dinners! My perfect day includes walking on the beach. I love meeting my friends for our weekly lunch. The rock climbing group I joined rocks! I've reconnected to my love of art and sketch twice weekly. Attitude of Gratitude. The perfect partner for me laughs easily and often. We spend quality time together. My perfect partner listens with an open heart and mind. My perfect mate loves to cook and entertain. My perfect mate is an engaged parent, yet sets healthy boundaries for his kids. I love that my partner respects my need for alone time. We enjoy taking pictures of nature together.

Cheri Valentine is your love connection expert. She specializes in guiding busy professional leaders and business owners to find long lasting love to enjoy as much happiness and success in their personal lives as they do in their career. Cheri's philosophy inspired love by design combined with her strong, supportive nature is reflected in her signature coaching programs. She believes everyone deserves to love and be loved unconditionally, to experience life passionately and to forge happy and healthy relationships. Cheri's own efforts to make sense of her ended marriages and relationships fueled her determination to get it right, be happy and find the right partner. She has succeeded and recently married her perfect mate. She wants to show you how she did it, and how you can, too, just like the many men and women she has helped to find love. Visit http://cherivalentine.com/ for your FREE 4 step kit to Attract Your Perfect Mate.

Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/?expert=Cheri_C_Valentine

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Are Divorced Women Wondering If They Will Ever Find True Love?

What is true love? Some poets compare it with the eternal flame which can never be put out. Is it a fair comparison? Actually, people define its meaning according to what they look for in a life partner. However, all of its definitions have one thing in common: true love will sustain through all ups and downs in a relationship or in a marriage.

As a divorced woman, you found out that the love you had thought was true turned out to be just the love for a moment. This makes you lose hope of ever finding true love, with a life partner who will love you no matter what; especially, if you are in the midlife age or older.

Unlike the young divorcees, you usually wonder if you will find your true love, and live a fulfilled life with the companionship of a lover, a friend and a soul mate; or you will live a lonely life, watching couples around you enjoying their togetherness, and wishing that were your life. If you have children, you will not be with them all the time, because they will have their own family; and very likely, they will not live near you.

Of course, you will not be bothered by these thoughts if you do not care that you will love again; or if you want to feel free, to be on your own, and to enjoy doing things without answering to anyone. However, even if you do not look for love and you are content to live by yourself, there are some moments, you will wonder about the same things; especially, when time goes on and you do not get any younger.

The truth is you are not the only one who wonders about ever finding true love. Whoever has not found the love he or she considers true, wonders just like you do. And he or she goes on searching for his or her true love; for many people, it may take their whole life to search for theirs, and still cannot find it. To say this does not mean to discourage you, it only means that it is normal and natural for you to wonder about that.

So, you do not need to lose hope of having true love. Your experiences with one man, or more than one, do not dictate that you attract only the man who is ultimately wrong for you. Instead, they help you to realize that you need to pay more attention to what was not good for you, and what did not work for you, as your past has shown you; they also remind you to choose prudently then treat lovingly and respectfully.

Mai Bordelon, aka The Coach for Divorced Women at http://lifecoachingcorner.com/, helps divorced women to become stronger & happier, to achieve a life they dream of with a partner worthy of their love, and to never feel they are under anyone's mercy again. Copyright ? 2010 My Little Corner, LLC. All Rights Reserved Worldwide. This article may be freely distributed if this resource box stays attached.

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Unrequited Love - The Tragedy of Losing The One You Love

Unrequited love can haunt anyone for many years or even for the rest of our lives. Somehow, there seems to be something romantic in all this tragedy.

Unrequited love is usually a feeling of attraction between two people who never had a chance to express their feelings. Or it could be a romance between two people that got stuck or hung in the air after one lover or partner simply disappeared.

If you can recall the tragic life of Ernest Hemingway, the writer, then you're on the right track.

Now here's a tragic unrequited love story I heard from my friend. He was a high school teacher when he met this really cute nurse. They both fell in love and they were an item for around five years. They were really very close and friends even commented that they liked the couple and were wishing and hoping that they could eventually get married and have kids.

But then, tragedy struck when she had to go back to her southern hometown because her mother fell terminally ill. She had to leave her work and move back to home to help her siblings take care of her mother. Even though every sibling was contributing to the medical of the mother, it wasn't really enough. Then, she got a lucky (or unlucky - depends on how you look at it) break: she got an offer to work for a newly developed hospital in Dubai which needed really experienced nurses.

Since moving back home, my friend and his girl have been constantly communicating. Twice, he even visited the girl's hometown. On his third visit, they talked about the Dubai opportunity. But, since the girl needed the job for her mother's medical care, my friend couldn't do anything but agree to it. To cut a long story short, the girl is still there as an expat since the hospital eventually decided to move her entire family to Dubai and her mother got better with the best medical care offered, and her siblings got good jobs in Dubai too. However, the girl never did marry.

And my friend? Oh he's still not married either but I did hear he has started dating again. At first they were communicating through chat rooms and web cam on the internet and making mobile phone calls now and then. However, once the reality set in that the girl wasn't coming back to the USA, they sort of just drifted apart until all communication stopped altogether.

According to psychology research on this topic from major American universities, the experience and feeling of unrequited love is actually universal. However, it can have a great effect on some persons which can prevent them from feeling any love or reciprocating love in the future.

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